When I decided to quit my corporate job and help people on their health journey, I promised to myself I would stay authentic with everything I shared to my community. It is easy to post and send newsletters when feeling on top of the world, when your heart is so full that is overflowing. But what happens when things are tricky and you are going through tough times, how can you inspire people and be the beacon of light for them?
I will be honest, in the last 10 weeks or so I have been on a rollercoaster. As an expat, leaving my home country and family behind to follow the love of my life, there are a few phone calls that I (or any other person living “abroad”) have been dreading to receive. The fact that I cannot physically be there for my mum or grandmas or friends in Hungary when they need me puts an enormous mental weight on my (and their) shoulders.
After receiving a call from my brother late on a Friday night about grandma going in for an emergency operation that she may not wake up from, I decided to book a flight to go home on the next flight I could. My brain switched on to auto pilot — it was almost an out of body experience. I held it together for everyone, pushing all emotions as far down as possible, with the promise I would “deal with them” when back in England. Luckily grandma survived the op and is ok, but the fear of losing her terrified me, so did seeing the strongest woman on Earth, my mum, crumble. Then the day after coming back to Sheffield, I had some more bad news from a dear friend who were losing the fight with cancer.
The choices I had — to numb & carry on or to put my big girls pants on and feel the feelings, even if these are painful, and work through it. I took it on as a bit of a project to see how good of a coach I am, but this time I became my own client. These are all simple things, as I believe in taking small steps which are more likely to stick and become tools in your pockets you can rely on when life gets hard.
What are the things I have tried so far:
Self-compassion: Giving myself a few hours off and allowing myself to feel the feelings, name the feelings and cry when I needed to. Communicate your needs to those around you and prioritise yourself during difficult times.
Hypnotherapy: The best type of therapy I have ever had — it helped me understand my subconscious mind and process suppressed emotions.
Exercise: Returning to swimming, yoga, and zumba classes. While difficult to initiate, these activities provided immediate relief.
Journaling: Writing without self-editing offered powerful healing effects, though overcoming the inner critic is a challenge worth taking on.
Breathing exercises and meditation: Best established before a crisis — starting during grief is more challenging, but never too late.
Nature: Barefoot walking, gardening, and listening to birdsong help ground and calm the nervous system.
Food: Shifting toward nourishing the body with colourful, fresh foods rather than relying on comfort foods as emotional numbing agents — while allowing occasional indulgences mindfully.
There are many more tools you can use to heal yourself. I hope you can stay curious and kind to yourself — even in the midst of trauma and difficult times.
With love,
Viki
